The traditional definitions for engineering include: ‘the application of mathematics, empirical evidence, scientific, social and practical knowledge in order to invent, design, build, maintain, research and improve structures, systems and components.’ I’d like to think of applying this definition to my own personal journey of change.
Frankly, in engineering terms, my life had not run particularly well up until the turn of the century. Not well, not smoothly, not economically, not dynamically. It was as if there hadn’t been a service for years. I wasn’t putting the right fuels and lubricants into my system, in fact more the equivalent of sugar in the petrol tank (true sabotage) or at the very least, leaded petrol in an unleaded car. My environment was hostile – fog, rain, icy roads, many of my parts had seized up, bulbs had gone in the lamps and indicators and I was in the habit of either leaving the handbrake on or never applying the brakes at all! And the mirrors – what mirrors? I wasn’t going to look back to see what chaos I might’ve caused. Are you with me so far?
The vehicle that was me – ‘vehicle’, as in a means, a channel, a force, a method or an approach – that vehicle – was in bad shape and going down a one-way street. The crash was inevitable. Rather than get a new vehicle, I decided to overhaul and repair the one I had. And that took “Inner Engineering”. Remember the Haynes Motor Car Manuals? They explained how to carry out routine maintenance, restoration and servicing of your vehicle – primarily aimed at the Do-it Yourselfer.
Over the years, I think every part of my vehicle has been dismantled and checked over, with many components and systems needing to be either replaced, upgraded or permanently scrapped. I’ve referred to the appropriate manuals, frequently. I’ve spoken with other Inner Engineering enthusiasts and shared ideas – even towing myself to a workshop when that’s what it took….
During this time, I have taken on several passengers – both long-term and short-term – I’ve often been the passenger myself, as it became quite clear that an Advanced Driving Instructor or Higher Mechanic was what I needed to continue the Inner Engineering overhaul.
In my experience, it takes a gentle, patient and loving approach to create real and lasting personal change. Even in traditional engineering environments, it isn’t possible to improve structures, systems and components by hammering, beating, wrenching and kicking! This has never been an effective approach to adaptations and repairs. Rather, it’s about easing, tending, oiling, adjusting, cleaning, resting and understanding. Easy does it.
Caroline Gibbs
Solihull, UK
