The
use of the word “I” is presumed to symbolize arrogance. The latter i.e.
arrogance is said to be the foundation of all perversities. Nevertheless, “I”
commands such a high importance that no other word is used so frequently. As a safety
measure, people may use certain courteous versions of “I”. But even so, “I”
consciousness lurks all the time in some corner of their mind or spirit. The latter
concept (of the spirit) transcends all bounds of words and narration. Hence it is
practically impossible to enjoy immunity from “I” consciousness. This fact is
illustrated by the following example.
An
ascetic stepped out of his cottage to see some friends. Just then a comrade of his boyhood
turned up. The ascetic was delighted to meet him and asked him to relax in his cottage
till his return. The friend, however, wished to accompany the ascetic to avoid boredom of
solitude. As his dress had become dirty because of his long journey, he asked the ascetic
to lend him a clean dress. The ascetic had with him royal robes once gifted to him by a
king. He accordingly lent that royal dress to his friend for use.
During
his visit to his first friend, the ascetic introduced his old pal and admired his
qualities. Simultaneously, however, the ascetic blurted out that
the royal robes put on by his friend actually belonged to him, not to his friend. This
discourtesy naturally offended his old friend, who expressed his displeasure. Thereupon
the ascetic expressed regret and promised to avoid such a lapse in future. During their
visit to the house of the second friend, the ascetic praised his old companion but
remarked that the fine attire of his friend belonged to the latter himself. This ironic
remark of the ascetic again incensed his old friend and he made no secret of it. At this,
the ascetic again apologized and pledged to say nothing about the dress again. On reaching
the house of the third friend, the ascetic as usual eulogized his old comrade but added
that he would say nothing about the regal clothes worn by his old friend as he had pledged
to avoid any comment on this point.
The
above episode may be real or imaginary, but it is not beyond bounds of human behavior. The
“I” consciousness manifests itself in some form or another. Man considers
himself a great scholar after getting high education. Regardless of his high or low
status, one cannot help fabricating facts and fiction to display one’s superiority.
In
sum, education, riches and even renunciation seem to aggravate one’s ego. This
recalls to my mind the story of a sage and an ascetic. One day the ascetic told the sage
that twenty years earlier he had kicked and renounced all his assets worth lacs and had
become ascetic. The sage calmly observed, “Your kick does not seem to have hit its
target squarely, otherwise it could not have lingered in your memory for twenty years.
”The sage continued, “Twenty years ago, you must be
proud of your high riches. But after relinquishing the riches, you are proud of the act of
relinquishment". The latter arrogance is
much more poisonous, destructive, intoxicating and invisible. This type of arrogance
enjoys immunity from any injury. Likewise, one’s disappointment and depression (on
deep insight) is sustained by an element of egoism. In fact, human egoism is but the upper
layer of his personality. Man is incapable of keeping himself apart from the impulse of
egoism though it generates superiority complex. It also induces him to humiliate and
degrade others and engulfs him in various disputes
and calamities. History
is replete with
evils of egoism. But man, instead of becoming wiser from such
incidents, willfully ignores them.
Man
continues to embrace egoism in spite of being conscious of the above painful facts. He
longs for a peaceful life but forgets that this is impossible without discarding egoism.
Nor can he achieve perfection without renouncing his ego. This ego-consciousness is indeed
potentially founded on sorrow and arrogance. Instead of dispelling egoism by firm faith,
man marches on the path of satisfying his insatiable desires. The latter know no terminus,
but human life terminates. Ultimately man makes exit without realizing his ideals. Egoism,
in fact, multiplies desires. Hence, one should curb them in the company of enlightened
souls i.e. Brahmgyanis.